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Origins of Trauma


In a previous article, we touched on some of the ways that birth can be difficult and traumatic for the baby. Here we will go into more detail about the different patterns which, if left unhealed, become our normal, distorted, behaviour as we grow up.

From the time we are conceived we are carrying a genetic inheritance of the distorted ancestral patterns of the father and the mother.   Each generation has an opportunity to transform these patterns, but only if they are aware.  Most people are not alert to this possibility and believe these patterns simply to be a part of their nature. In Human Design terms, genetically, the heavy influence of Mars carries an energy from the father that needs to be transformed.  It is only through this transformation that we can live out who we really are, following our inner truth.

Each one of us has come with work to do in this lifetime, but unless we find a level of awareness, growth and healing while we are here, we may depart without any knowledge of transformation and our true potential.  Every cell in the body vibrates at a frequency and if we can raise the frequency of our cells then we can come into resonance with the planet and our purpose here.  Although we are each born with a particular genetic pattern there are always possibilities for raising the frequency of that pattern so we live it out correctly instead of living a life of struggle when we are not in harmony.  When we are living our true genetic role we find it is what we are here to do, what we are passionate about, what interests us most; and by doing our own work, we are raising the overall frequency of the planet.

Some significant patterns that we carry are just who we believe ourselves to be.  These need to be transformed before we can truly be correct and self-realised.

1.   Mother’s need?

Ideally, all babies should be invited by both parents.  When one parent is not fulfilled by the partnership one solution is to fill the gap with a baby to love.  This is never an answer and places a huge burden on the baby that is essentially conceived and born to help repair the parent’s relationship.  Any child with this pattern will always seek the security of a solid foundation in their life.  This could take the form of marrying someone who needs someone to love and also offers a very solid foundation.

2.   Not recognised?

About 70% of births start as twin births.  The mother subconsciously identifies with one particular foetus even if two tiny foetuses are present.  If one of the developing foetuses leaves and the mother has already bonded with that one, the remaining foetus will feel unnoticed.  There are two dynamics going on here for the surviving baby; the first one is that it suddenly feels lonely, bereft and unrecognised because of the mother bonding with the other, departed twin. The second is that the surviving twin becomes intensely resentful of the departed twin for taking nourishment that the surviving twin needed.    

When the child is born, it will project that resentment onto an older or younger sibling.  The mother may be surprised to find that it’s not the child that she was subconsciously expecting. The baby will feel the lack of recognition that it felt throughout the pregnancy; this pattern will recapitulate with a parent, sibling or partner.  If that parent, sibling or partner dies, then it is just projected onto another. There is always someone else who is taking from them – and can’t give back (often financially).  The truth is that although resources were limited in the womb, they do not have to be limited in the real world.

3.   Wanted or Not?

Although many people “find they are pregnant”, an unplanned or accidental birth is not a healthy way to conceive a child.  A baby needs to be planned and consciously wanted by both parents to come into the correct, nurturing environment.  Even if the parents are delighted to find there is a baby on the way, it does not dispel that disconnection of the unaware parents during those first few weeks.  Children born with this pattern are often at a friend’s house, staying the night, bonding with those parents.  They try not to be too demanding and do everything for themselves because they think they have to. It’s a survival mechanism for them. They may be children who are put into daycare before nursery school, so that the parents can both work.  In later relationships they are never sure of the solidity of the partnership and need constant affirmation of their value to the partner. 

4.   Lost twin?

 Another twin dynamic, although this is one where the two foetuses bond  with each o ther.  One twin departs and the other has lost the potential  ‘best friend’.  Once born, this surviving twin bonds with a sibling, a parent,  a friend at school, anyone who it perceives it can have the kind of close  relationship that it had with its lost twin. They will marry their best friend  only to find that the relationship is suffocating for the other, or if they both  have the same wound, suffocating for both.  They may also see that there is  no bond; that initial recognition was just a phase because that other person  also had a twin wound.  There is always a double bind in a twin dynamic.    There is nothing we can do to heal a double bind, but be informed and once aware of the pattern, wait for the miracle, which always appears.

5.   Delusion

The true betrayal of the delusion and disconnect patterns is that they are imposed through external intervention.  If a couple conceive after a heavy bout of drinking or taking drugs then the “drug affect” becomes imprinted in the baby and often recapitulates at birth by interventions such as C-sections and chemical pain management.  It is this wound where the “false memories” issue originates.  We remember in the cells of the body what may have happened in the past to our ancestors.  We have inherited the pattern and it is our job in this lifetime to heal it rather than find someone to blame for it.  Children with this pattern will grow up feeling blamed because they appear to be delusional, through the lack of clarity in the brain.  They feel fuzzy headed until they can clear the toxins in the fourth ventricle of the brain (filled with cerebrospinal fluid) where the impact of the drug remains. They can be addicted to alcohol, drugs or other chemical substances until they discover where the pattern originated and can start to work on healing.  Cranio-sacral work can help to release the toxicity in the fourth ventricle.  Forgiveness for those who have blamed is a key to healing this pattern.

6.   Disconnect

 Forceps and Caesarian Sections (which also have the chemical  aspect) have become very common methods of delivering a  baby whether it is necessary or not. Any rough handling by  someone pulling a baby out of the womb by its head in a  slightly too heavy handed manner can cause immense  damage.  The tiny skull is still very fragile and both these  methods should only be used in a life or death emergency.    Male doctors decided to make child birth a medical procedure  and initially they secretly used forceps and other tools to  “assist” the birth.  The resultant pain to the baby is almost impossible to bear, and the baby disconnects from the body in order to survive.  So the baby continues to spend the rest of its life in “disconnect” because it cannot be grounded and centred in its body.  These are the people who seem to be “on another planet” or “away with the fairies” and drift through life; and they have bouts of intense anger.  Nothing can possibly work for them when they are not grounded and centred in the body.  We are here to be body oriented people, yet for those who have had a forceps birth, the body is perceived as a dangerous place to be.  It continues to  invite abuse simply through the aura.  There is also a sense of wanting to go home, not being afraid of death, possibly even having had a sense of “the divine” at that moment of disconnect.  These people need a great deal of body work and realignment of the cranium to succeed with their lives.


This is just a brief look at what the distortions are.  A baby is only in the present moment and believes what happens at the moment of birth is “forever”, until someone informs them otherwise when they are able to rationalise.  There are much more detailed healing procedures, but to start with we need to identify the patterns. 

If a parent can speak to the baby, apologise for what happened, and explain the circumstances “you may not have survived if we had performed this intervention……”, then the emotional trauma around the event can be released. 

It is never too late – you can apologise to your 40-year old children about what happened at their birth.  It could transform their life.

Phylipa Dinnen

Practitioner of Pre and Peri Natal Birth Trauma



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